Observations and letting out steam about overprotection....

He was riding an adult size bicycle, which was too large for his young age.
The seat was set too high for him, and his short legs hardly reached the pedals.

As he made his way along the dusty path that led from the river, the boy was calling for people to get out of his way.
He had no bicycle bell, and If he had to stop abruptly, he would have to brake and immediately jump off the bike to reach the ground.

On one side of the handlebars, he had a small fish, tied on a fishing line.

When I say small, I do mean small... The fish was a little bigger than a sardine.

Two other boys walked on the same dusty path behind him, carrying their own "catch of the day".
They were wearing only stained short pants and I could count their skinny ribs, stretched below their beautiful brown skins.

One lucky boy caught three small fishes, and another boy, had one single fish on a line.

The boys were giddy with happiness.
The fact that they caught ANY fish, meant that their family will enjoy something they contributed for dinner.

When they left home that morning, their mothers told them to look around as they go about their play, for edible things.
It can be a bull frog that could be skinned and grilled, a large lizard that could be the base for a soup, a porcupine, or better yet, a snake.

From a very young age, the boys learn responsibility and are expected to contribute to feeding the family and caring for their siblings.
Some attend to the cattle, others help in the family farm.
They never eat the cattle.
They only use it to plow the fields or to carry heavy items.

That day the boys were headed for the muddy river, where they will spend their day playing, running barefoot, and trying to catch fish.

The river was originally diverted to fill a moat, which was a wide trench, filled with water, surrounding a dilapidated ancient temple, that the king built in honor if his esteemed spiritual teacher.
Nowadays, most of the temple is in ruins.

The boys spend their days playing in the ruins of the vast temple complex.
They run like little agile monkeys up and down the large piles of mossy green stones, stacked many meters high.
They climb up the banyan trees with impossible ease and run down crumbling steep roofs with extreme ease.

One boy is very small and seem to have a problem with dragging one of his tiny leg.
The other boys suggest to him better ways to climb, or where to step, but they do not suggest that he stay behind.... They want to "toughen" him.

And so he climbs behind them, panting and doing his very best, not to show his fears, as we enter some dark and long chambers, or climb some really narrow bridges and ascend ladders and makeshift wooden stairs.

The other boys, encapsulate the spirit of childhood and playfulness.
It is as if they are not even aware that they occupy a body that may have limitations.

They walk barefooted, with balance and poise on rotting balustrades, set many meters high above the ground. Just looking down from the path, gives me a sense of vertigo.... Yet these boys are fearless, and they run across the balustrades with ease, as if they were on solid ground.

They stop to look if I am noticing them.... They are proud of their acrobatic tricks, and they call for me to pay attention, when they do something extra daring or dangerous.

Despite myself, I find my heart jump in my chest, every time they do something that can end up badly.
I do not want to think the worst, but I come from a society that is so overly regulated with safety devices, and I naturally skip a breath, when they jump.

This leads me to remember my own childhood.
Unprotected and wild, I spent days swimming and running outdoors, rarely wore shoes and never any safety devices and yes... I fell a million times.

I know that my opinion may not be popular among many people who may read this, but even today, I am not a fan of using too many protective safety devices myself.

I think that we over regulate and that we are enforcing too strictly, the use of safety devices.
I also think that it can lead to people who are not agile and less capable of protecting themselves when physical dangers arise.

I once saved my own life instinctively, by not wearing a seat belt in the car, when my ex husband almost collided our van and trailer into a train in Indiana.
I jumped out of the front seat and into the back seat in a second, the moment the front passenger side was crashed in my direction.
If I was tied with a seatbelt into my seat, I would had my legs crashed.

Luckily, my instincts told me to jump to the back and my body followed the instructions.
I do not like wearing a safety vest while kayaking in CALM waters, and I never wear a helmet while skiing.

I do wear a car's seat belt all the time now.
Not because I believe it will save my life, but because me and my husband were fined $360 for not wearing them, while driving in Auckland.

They have made it against the law, to put a child in a car, without strapping him into a child's car seat...... but I remember growing up safely with no child seat and no seat belts.

Kids who are overly protected, do not learn the powers of their own bodies.
They are robbed of the natural awareness that their bodies can be strong and very flexible.

They do not know how to fall, and they harm themselves too easily, not utilizing their self protective instincts.


When the kids who were raised in an overly protective environment, grow up, they become adults who are constantly afraid to take chances in life.

It had been drummed into them to be careful and to stay safe, that naturally they lose their entrepreneurial spirit, that requires them to jump into the unknown with trust..... To take many chances....... To be vulnerable and at risk.


Excuse me for saying this...
But....
We are raising a bunch of wimps....

The overly protected kids, who grow up, are still afraid to hurt themselves and they are afraid to disappoint their worrying parents.
They rather live a sheltered life, expect others to warn them about every possible risk, or they'll sue for damages.

Oh...when I think of all the release forms we have to sign before doing ANYTHING...
It makes me dizzy.....

Are the cigaret companies really responsible for warning you that their products are dangerous to your health?

It was ALWAYS common knowledge that smoking was hazardous to your health and that it is YOUR choice whether to succumb to this nasty habit on or not.

And I am tired of hearing the argument that the cigaret companies started adding addictive substances to cigarets....
Everybody who quit smoking, knows that despite any additives, it is COMPLETELY POSSIBLE to quit smoking despite of it.

Because people sue so easily for damages, we all pay the price of higher living cost, higher medical care, higher insurance and we are afraid to make many moves in life.
Starting a businesses today, means taking risk and taking chances...
And many do not dare...because they are afraid to get sued.

When it comes to making your dreams come true, getting a good job, following your heart, falling in love, starting a family, going on a world tour.....all of these require taking chances.... Trusting the unknown....


If we are overly protective of ourselves....
If we are so scared to get wounded or hurt...
We are feeding ourselves with a collection of wrong and limiting messages.


OK... I vented out some steam....

Now let me take you to Kohukohu New Zealand. (it really nice to be a kid growing up in rural NZ... you still don't have to wear shoes and parents are less crazy with protecting you)

It is a lovely evening and in the Town Hall, there is a celtic dance night.
Neighbors and friends are meeting to dance....
Talented musicians are vibrating lovely celtic tunes...
There is excitement and magic in the air.

A little girls, is playing by the side wall.
She bends and flexes her body as if it was made of rubber.
She jumps and summersault as if gravity is not a factual force... But merely a suggestion.

She lays on her stomach on the hard floor, and bend both her feet backwards, towards her face, and she rests them on the top of her head.
She lays in this impossible acrobatic position, as if her spine is not made of bones, but of soft and supple clay....

I look at her and I remember my own free, non televised, pre- media, carefree childhood.
And then I remember these boys in Cambodia... Fishing for the family dinner...
Catching a snake for a meal....
And I divert my memory to the lines of minivans and SUV's waiting outside schools, to take kids back home from school, that I saw in the USA.... Because kids may be abducted on the mile or so they have to walk back from school.....
And I think........ that these Cambodian kids are the lucky ones!